“Looked at Myself as an Athlete”: Michael Phelps Opened Up on Losing Identity as a Person While Becoming Most Decorated Olympian

Swimming legend Michael Phelps is the most decorated Olympian and broke a 2000-year record of winning the most individual titles at the Olympics in Rio 2016. But his journey to Olympic glory was filled with obstacles.

Phelps has opened up about his struggles with depression and suicidal ideation many times in the past. In a recent interview, he talked about how he became immersed in the sport’s competitiveness and lost his sense of self.

Michael Phelps talks about struggles with identity

When you have achieved unprecedented heights in your career, it sometimes becomes difficult to separate yourself from your achievements. For Michael Phelps, training day in and day out helped him win 28 Olympic medals, 23 of them gold. But in the process, he became unable to recognize himself as a person.

“Throughout my whole career, I looked at myself as an athlete, not a human being,” Phelps shared. Gesturing to his face, he continued, “I didn’t see this in the mirror. I saw my cap and goggles going out to race. I didn’t see myself as Michael Phelps: the person.” The swimmer is one of those rare athletes that completely dominated their sport for a long time.

In his two-decades-long career, swimming took over Phelps’ life. “My identity was strictly around the pool, and that took a long time for me to understand, and to process, and to realize that I am a human. I guess over the last seven years since I retired, I think that’s where I’ve finally been able to see. Yeah, I’m a human being.”

READ MORE: “Didn’t Eat, Didn’t Drink, Didn’t Do Anything”: Michael Phelps Recalls the Scariest 45 Days of His Life

In 2012, the London Olympics were supposed to be Michael Phelps’ last competition. He announced his retirement after winning six medals—four gold and two silver bumping his tally to 22. But Phelps returned to competition shortly after in 2014, hoping to have another run at the Olympics in Rio.

Phelps has been open about his mental health struggles

Michael Phelps retired in 2016 and has been spending his free time with his family. He has pivoted to philanthropic and entrepreneurial roles. His charity, the Michael Phelps Foundation, works to promote water safety and mental health.

The 27-time world champion has openly talked about his battle with depression and how it affected his life despite enormous success. He strongly believes that if sharing his story can help even one person feel better about their struggles and feel seen, it is worth it.

“Hopefully, I can save a life. I can help somebody else because I know the feelings that I have, I had, what I go through every single day, every single week, every single month. I know I’m not alone and I understand that for me it’s OK to not be OK,” he said.

Now, Phelps spends his time with his three sons, Boomer, Beckett, and Maverick, and his wife, Nicole Johnson Phelps. He hopes his legacy will not just be his achievements in the pool but also the work he has put into spreading awareness about mental health.

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