“I’m Going To Die”: Simone Biles’ Gymnastics Journey From Imperfection to Podium Is Unreal

“I’m not the next Usain Bolt or Michael Phelps. I’m the first Simone Biles.“ And with that, the seven-time Olympian has punched her tickets to Minneapolis for the 2024 Gymnastics Olympic Trials. Her journey to the Paris Olympics is the most talked-about comeback in the sport, especially after her exit from the Tokyo Olympics in 2021 due to the ‘Twisties’ and mental health struggles. Soon after the Olympics, Simone Biles, along with McKayla Maroney, Aly Raisman, and Maggie Nichols, testified against former USA gymnastics doctor Larry Nassar.

She linked her setbacks at the Tokyo Olympics to her struggle to recover mentally after being abused by Nassar, saying, “As a recent competitor in the Tokyo Games who was a survivor of this horror, I can assure you the impacts of this man’s abuse are not over or ever forgotten.” Now, as she inches closer to her third Olympics, let’s explore how she has transformed these horrifying experiences into the driving force behind her athletic success.

How does Simone Biles cope with her dark thoughts?

At the post-2024 U.S. National Championship Press Conference, Simone Biles answered blazing questions seated amid her coaches, Laurent and Cécile Landi. A standout moment came when a reporter asked about the biggest change in her training and her mindset for this Olympic cycle.

Simone Biles responded, “Well, first, I do a lot of therapy. Every time I’m in therapy, if I’m like, “Oh, I’m going to die,” she’s like, “Don’t say that, that’s not good to rehearse. It’s not good to say that.” Or whatever negative thoughts I have, she’s like, “This is therapy, it’s an open space, but please don’t say that, you can’t remind yourself that.”

Reflecting on her experience leading up to the 2016 Olympics, Simone mentioned there was an advantage to competing blindly. She didn’t know much, and the expectations were lower. This made the experience less stressful. However, after participating in two Olympics, the stress increased because she now knew exactly what to expect and had higher expectations for herself. Now, with a clear understanding of the qualifications and expectations, she acknowledged the beauty in the ignorance she had before.

She focused on controlling what she could. Reflecting on these words, seeing the incredible growth achieved over the past three years through self-care and therapy is inspiring. Let’s revisit how she bravely opened up about her trauma and how the abuse she endured contributed to her darkest days.

Simone vs Herself

In January 2018, Simone Biles courageously revealed in a Twitter post, “I am not afraid to tell my story anymore. I too am one of the many survivors that was sexually abused by Larry Nassar.“ Following Nassar’s conviction, in 2021, Biles bravely opened up about her mental trauma in the fourth episode of her Facebook Watch docu-series, Simone vs. Herself.

She painfully recounted experiencing thoughts of suicide during this dark period. With tears in her eyes, she shared, “I remember telling my mom and my agent that I slept all the time, and it’s basically because sleeping was basically better than offing myself.” Simone Biles described feeling deeply depressed and isolating herself, not wanting to leave her room or interact with others.

Her mother, Nellie, noted that Simone was initially in denial and would become very upset when attempts were made to discuss the issue. Understanding the need for patience, Nellie gave her daughter space until she felt ready to talk. When Simone eventually opened up, Nellie recalled that she was very emotional, and they shared a moment of tears, understanding, and support.

Over time, Simone Biles developed coping strategies to manage her feelings with the help of therapy. Today, she stands as a powerful advocate for those who have faced similar challenges and continues to dominate the gymnastics mat, breaking barriers as the oldest woman at 27 to win the all-around national title. Despite the criticism and trauma she faced after the Tokyo Olympics, her words following the 2024 U.S. National Championship show the incredible growth she has found in turning her vulnerabilities into strengths. What do you think about her remarkable journey and growth over the years? Share your thoughts in the comments below!