“I Just Suck”: Suni Lee Confesses Grief Over Biggest Olympic Win of Gymnastics Career

“I honestly forget that I won the Olympics sometimes,” came from Suni Lee, who has the all-around title from Tokyo. She iterated those words because of her experience during the post-Tokyo Olympics phase. In this timeline, she could hardly find a bright end to her unfortunate fate. In 2023, when she elevated herself to a respectable position in NCAA gymnastics, her kidney ailments extended her pain, keeping her away from the mats. Furthermore, because of the same reason, the 21-year-old couldn’t earn a call in the national squad, which was detrimental to her Paris Olympics participation prospects. But those are not the only low points Suni has had to survive in the last three years.

After the Tokyo Olympics, the online hatred toward her found extra air, and the surrounding clamor increased day by day. In her conversation with New York Times’ correspondent Juliet Macur, Suni Lee expressed the situation. The backlash she received made her question her Olympic gold medal win, as she felt she didn’t deserve it. Not only did she cry herself to sleep on most nights, but she also missed having a normal life. “Many people are saying the same thing over and over and that I just suck and all this stuff, it’s like very hard mentally,” she said, adding that she did not have many options to retort, and the reason behind it was more overwhelming. 

Suni’s kidney ailments nipped her NCAA gymnastics career in the bud. After concluding a successful 2022 season, she had to call it off in March 2023 hurriedly, as per her physicians’ suggestions. So, this unfinished job added to extend her pain that had no sign to stop biting her up. Suni Lee felt it was hard to express the downtime in her life. Such an irony it had been—from the top of the gymnastic world down to “rotten on the bed” counting her days to stand again in her full health! She added that it was a frightening period of time for her as she didn’t know if she could ever do gymnastics again. Meanwhile, the Minnesota-born narrated the need for her present self, who knows how to tackle unforeseen challenges now. 

In the same interview, she conceded, “For so many different reasons since Tokyo, I had to really grow up, and fast.” In this process, she found her Auburn coach, Jeff Graba, and his brother, Jess Graba, alongside her. But pushing away a gloomy part where the gymnast had faced physical and mental absurdity subsequently was not the stroll in the park for the brothers. Moreover, they had to counter several more complications while handling their mentee this year. 

Suni Lee had signs of having deep issues

In January, this year, Suni informed her coach that she would want to make her comeback on the mat. Nothing could have been better news than this in the Paris Olympics season. So fine-tuning everything, both Jeff and Jess Graba initiated the process. On the other hand, the former US National medalist tried to put her into the schedule slowly but steadily. The result was there, as in the Winter Cup, she registered herself as a participant. But soon her coaches explored a distinct reality. 

In an interview with Olympics.com, Jess Graba forwarded his and his brother’s take on Suni Lee’s new self. Maintaining the emotional side of the issue, he shared, “She [Suni Lee] can pretty much do everything, but that doesn’t mean [her] mind knows it.” It was in those days when the gymnast was trying to explore her newly-found abilities. But as per the coaches, Suni’s mind was keeping itself shelled, facing mental hindrances because of all the experiences. And the coaches were not habituated to pulling down such mental demons. 

“We’re not used to dealing with, ‘I’ve been out for six months and now, I’m back’,” Jess Graba issued his statement on this. However, Suni herself tried to find a break in that shell. Her habit of journaling helped her a lot to find an edge. Now she is in Paris, eyeing to compete in her second all-around final at the Olympics. Let’s hope she ends her second Olympic endeavor on a high note, as she did three years ago, in the Japanese capital.