“It’s truly only me that knows the whole story and what I need to succeed.” That line was part of a cryptic message Hailie Deegan left when her Xfinity ride stopped. Her team, AM Racing’s statement, was cold as stone, wishing her the best for her future endeavors. Even as Deegan has turned over a new leaf, the former ARCA Menards ace cannot help but reflect on her NASCAR struggles.

Some called it her excessively swift move through the racing ranks, and some simply bashed her for being a bad racer. But a handful of drivers zoomed into the bigger picture of her team. AM Racing entered the Xfinity scene only in 2023 with Brett Moffitt. And after blaming Deegan for its troubles, it is hardly doing better without her, as a Xfinity veteran pointed out.

Hailie Deegan reveals her bitter struggle

As a decorated off-road racer, Hailie Deegan’s initial chapters of her racing journey looked good. She clinched three wins in the ARCA Menards Series West in 2018 and ’19. After transitioning from Toyota to Ford in 2019, she achieved laurels in ARCA – she was third in the point standings and earned four top-five and 17 top-10 finishes. However, entering NASCAR’s national series marked a turning point, as Deegan’s finishes declined. Over a three-year season in Craftsman Truck, Deegan could eke out five top-tens with an average finish of 21st.

Then her Xfinity venture was even worse. In her 17 races with the team, Hailie Deegan registered an average finishing position of 26.82. But her replacements after AM Racing washed its hands of her were no better, as Kenny Wallace recently shared during his exclusive interview with Deegan. “The last three races, they have finished 27th, 27th, and 33rd.” The No. 15 Airbox Ford had a bad streak even without Hailie, with an average finish of 26.25 – only slightly better than Deegan. She was a little warmed by Wallace’s discovery: “I think there is some sort of reassurance in it of everything…I won’t talk about it too much.”

However, Hailie Deegan did talk about some dire aspects of her Xfinity experience. While she scored those bad finishes – her best run was 12th in Talladega – Deegan had a hard time reconciling with the team’s apparent nonchalance. “I can’t tell you how many nights I flew back on the team planes like wanting to just break down crying. And I’m not a crier. I’m like a pissed-off crier. Like if I’m crying, it’s because I’m mad. How many nights I just wanted to like beat my head against the wall. Like I didn’t know what to do because of stuff that was out of my control.” 

Now Deegan is out of that mess and invested in her Indy NXT pursuit. Although her first trial went haywire, she is not losing hope.

Deegan stays motivated for IndyCar

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A week ago, Hailie Deegan’s NASCAR fans got the news they had been waiting for. Deegan announced her tie-up with HMD Motorsports for a full-season Indy NXT run in 2025. But her stint at the Chris Griffis Memorial test session at Indianapolis Motor Speedway drooped expectations. Deegan ran a top speed of 111.280 mph in a 67-lap session over the 2.439-mile course. Even Tommy Smith, 2nd-last among speedsters on the list, was three miles per hour faster than Deegan at 114.434. This lagging speed drew criticism from fans, who expected more from her.

However, Hailie Deegan is not too bothered by the backlash. She explained, “First time at Indianapolis Motor Speedway in general, so it’s definitely a lot to take in all at once. These cars are very, very fun to drive, very different from what I’m used to. I drove an open-wheel car one other time, so this is definitely a lot to take in.” She further added, “The open-wheel side has so many different nuances to this world in itself. There’s so much more data and resources to go off of. I think learning how to utilize things to their fullest potential is what I’m going to have to learn.”

Clearly, Hailie Deegan is not backing out just because her baby steps went wrong. With a new IndyCar journey looming ahead, Deegan has all hands on deck.