‘Thinking About Committing Suicide’ – Nick Kyrgios Opens Up About His Dark Phase Admitting That He Harmed Himself

Nick Kyrgios might not be the best player on the tour. However, he is undoubtedly one of the most energetic and entertaining players. The Australian is known for having a fun attitude on court as well as off the court. However, going back in time, towards the end of 2019 and the start of 2020, the fun-loving Kyrgios underwent a phase of severe depression.

Eyeing his maiden Grand Slam semifinal at the 2022 Wimbledon Championships, Kyrgios is set to take on Cristian Garin in the quarterfinals today. However, yesterday, the 5th of July, the Aussie took some time off from his intense practice to open up about his dark phase.

Nick Kyrgios recalls his fight with depression

Going back in time, 2019 was one of the best years for Nick Kyrgios. It was the year in which he won 2 titles, Acapulco and Washington. Entering 2020, he kicked off the year by reaching the semifinals of the ATP Cup. He further reached the fourth round of the Australian Open before finally ending his year with a wrist injury at Acapulco.

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Even though Kyrgios had a decent performance on-court, that didn’t seem to be the case on his personal front, as the Aussie was undergoing a dark phase.

Recalling the time, Kyrgios said, “That was such a dark year for me. I was playing the fourth round of the Australian Open and Kobe (Bryant) passed away. Everything with the bushfires was going on. I was doing my part. Trying to help with that. But I was honestly in the worst possible mindset that year. I was self-harming…”

In cases like these, people are advised to share their feelings with their close ones or even with a doctor. However, as one says, it is easier said than done. It seemed to be the same case with Kyrgios.

“I just was not able to share. I didn’t feel comfortable coming out. I was scared to share the way I was feeling because I don’t think Nick Kyrgios was able to feel that way. I don’t think anyone would have respected if I felt that way,” he further admitted.

The changes in life after recovery

Recovering from the unpleasant phase, Kyrgios today stands as a stronger self. However, dealing with the situation has undoubtedly left a lasting impact on him. “I feel I never judge anyone anymore because I have done some terrible things. I have done some dark things. I’ve been through so much,” he opened up further.

Kyrgios is amongst the few players who regularly interact with his fans via his social media handles. In February this year, he put up an Instagram post talking about his fight with depression and suicidal thoughts. Ever since that Instagram post, the Aussie has been in contact with people undergoing a similar phase, helping them overcome it.

“All my goal now is to guide people through. Guide people through that sh*t. Because it was brutal for me. It was so hard, I felt so alone. Obviously, it was the point of self-harm and thinking about committing suicide. It was tough.”

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With things back in place, Kyrgios is heading towards his best Grand Slam performance. If he wins the quarterfinal clash against Cristian Garin, he will next phase the winner of Rafael Nadal and Taylor Fritz.